Old slippers are dangerous, official. Yesterday I was rushing to get out of the house on time with the boys. Picture chaos, one boy running in one direction, dragging a coat behind him whilst the other one took off his shoes and socks. Nanny is frantically rushing the length of the hall, scooping up a toddler, realising he has a dirty nappy on and is heading back, at speed, to the nappies etc when suddenly her legs are swept from under her and she is shooting headfirst toward the floor with her precious cargo of a grandson clasped to her bosom. The next couple of seconds are somewhat vague, my brain must have been so busy commanding my torso to manoeuvre so as to protect Louis that it didn’t register any thoughts until I was on the floor with Louis to one side, cradled in my arms. My first thought was to check if he was okay, he was, if a trifle bemused and my next thought was that I had possibly broken my foot and wrist. Pain!! Sitting Louis up I hopped into the kitchen where I took several deep breaths and examined my wrist. Full mobility, if rather bruised, foot, really, really sore unable to bend my big toe without considerable discomfort. A quick ferreting around in the freezer found the feme-pad, a gel pad designed for using on sore perineums, ideal for wrapping around a foot and putting one of Hubby’s socks on to keep it in place and I walked, gingerly, back to the boys. The boys were both still sitting where I had left them, a miracle or a sign of how disturbed they were by Nanny’s antics! What had caused my crash-landing? My comfy but flapping slippers. The sole had come away but I had been too lazy, otherwise occupied, to replace them. Needless to say the slippers were in the dustbin immediately.
Hubby was cross with me, after all I’m ‘getting on and could have ended up with a broken hip’, he has realised that I am perimenopausal and has obviously decided that I am at risk of developing osteoporosis. Perhaps he has the same Google homepage as me with a ‘how to of the day’ section , today’s section has a ‘How to treat menopause symptoms’ entry. Anyway, I have tough old bones, the wrist is sprained and the toe joint stiff and painful, but my bones are still in one piece.